As I’ve argued before, Trump is vulnerable to assaults on his brand. It does no good to hyperventilate and label him an authoritarian, or a crazy loon. Those charges support the political element of his brand, bolstering his reputation as a guy that can go to Washington and make a difference, even if it resembles the difference Samson made to the temple.
I don’t want to build him up; I want him to abandon the project of the presidency.
Semiotically and rhetorically speaking, Trump desires that his brand be associated with luxury and potency. He’s deluxe, he’s huge. That’s why calling him an authoritarian, or a dictator waiting to trash the Republic, does little good. Words and phrases like that support his positioning on the potency axis.
A more cunning rhetorical strategy is to associate the Trump brand with the cheap, meagre, and mean, with the weak, impotent, and inconsequential.
One of Hillary’s smart moves was to address Trump in the debates as “Donald.” Note the semiotic distance between “Donald” and “Mr. Trump.” Mister is only used today in connection with individuals of status, power, and position. You call your boss Mister. You address your intimates and inferiors by their first names.
Going forward, protocol calls for addressing him as President Trump. That’s far too honorific. It bolsters his brand every time it is uttered. The President of the United States of America is about as yuuge as it gets.
To counter that drumbeat of honor, regular perversions of the Trump name are in order. The goal is a cacaphony of disrespect, incessant and unexpected.
Turns out a large number of English words either rhyme or half rhyme with our new president’s patronym. Interestingly, most of these rhyming words cluster in the negative, backward, and unpleasant regions of semantic space. In addition, although I don’t know enough linguistics to say why, the –ump and –umb sounds are so automatically recognizable to the English speaker, I wager that virtually every entry in the table, preceded by the word “President,” will instantly be understood as a reference to Trump, despite the differences in orthography and / or phonemes.
Here is a table, organized by rhymes and part-rhymes.
| Rhymes | Half-Rhymes |
| President Frump | President Dumb |
| President Rump | President Numb |
| President Hump | President Crumb |
| President Dump | President Crumble |
| President Chump | President Dumpling |
| President Grump | President Tumble |
| President Lump | President Harrumph |
| President Mumps | President Trumpt |
| President Plump | President Dumped |
| President Slump | |
| President Sump |
As proof of concept, pronounce the following word on first glance: President Dumbf. Because of howthe lips and palate have to move to go from the ‘um’ sound to the ‘f’ sound, it will come out almost rhyming with Trump, while allowing you to mentally add another phoneme or two after the ‘f’.
If enough of us repeatedly address President Rump in day to day conversation, or regularly refer to President Frump, the odds of a newscaster slip go up. We’ll hear President Slump, when the downturn comes, President Hump, on the next accusation of sexual harassment, President Chump, on the next bone-headed hire, President Tumble, when next the stock market swoons, and so forth.
Late night comics and SNL can have fun with President Humparump and President HumptyTrumpty; but to really subvert the Frump brand, there needs to be a daily dose of disrespect, welling up from the masses.
Pick your favorite from the list, and use it regularly in ordinary conversation. Start this week.
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